Hi. My name’s J.D. I have a fitness site.
I’ve been scarce around here for the past few months, and for a number of reasons. I’ve decided that in order to succeed at my goals, I need to be less scarce.
One of the reasons I’ve been scarce is that I let myself be bothered by some of the feedback I received. I’m not a fitness expert — not by any means. In fact, I’m a raw novice at this. I’m making plenty of mistakes along the way, and I’ve been writing about these mistakes. Sometimes I don’t even recognize them as mistakes at the time.
Because I’m being so forthcoming about the choices I’m making, I leave myself open for a lot of criticism. For some of you, it’s frustrating to watch me do the same damn thing over and over again, especially when I should know better. Who needs a Hostess Sno-Ball? It’s obvious I know better than to choose them, and yet I choose them anyhow.
So you get frustrated with me, and I get frustrated with your frustration, and then I go away and sulk for a while.
This isn’t an issue at Get Rich Slowly because I’m much much further along the path to success than I am here. But that wasn’t always the case. Mac can remember a time not so long ago when I was making plenty of dumb financial decisions.
I particularly remember one sunny afternoon as we were driving to a local Independence Day rodeo. I had just come into some cash somehow (a bonus at work?) and was planning all the ways I would spend it. Mac and Pam were flabbergasted. “Weren’t you just complaining about being broke last week?” they asked. I admitted that I had been, but I didn’t see their point.
I’m not like that with money anymore. But I am like that with food and fitness. What that means is that, for my part, Get Fit Slowly is different than Get Rich Slowly. Get Rich Slowly is about the things I’ve learned and the things that I’m learning. It’s largely about things that I’ve found that work.
Get Fit Slowly, on the other hand, is more about finding things that work. See the difference? I don’t have a lot of success with fitness yet. I’m exploring. I’m learning. I’m falling on my face — over and over and over. For some of you, this isn’t entertaining or enlightening. It’s just annoying.
And so, I’ve been silent.
Now, however, I’ve come to the realization that it doesn’t matter if this is annoying to you. I’d like for it to be entertaining and instructive, but what’s important is for me to document my daily progress — or lack of it. This site cannot yet be a direct analog to Get Rich Slowly, but with fitness. I’m not there yet. Neither is Mac. We hope to reach that point someday, but it’s going to take us a while.
We’re going to get fit — slowly.
{ 26 comments… read them below or add one }
JD, losing weight and getting healthy is a journey – sometimes good and sometimes bad – just take the walk. I think you are doing great, much better than I am and I find you an inspiration. I’m marveling at your running, which is something I’ve never tried and am now entertaining the idea. Notice the “entertaining”, lol. Snow and ice are stopping me from actually trying it but I am bundling up and taking the poor dog for walks, but who knows what will happen in the spring?
Stay on track, keep writing about it – there are lots of us out there that don’t comment all the time who are pulling for you.
Good luck to you guys, J.D. and Mac!
I like the way you’re thinking, JD.
I think you are on the right track. It takes time to get good at anything. Just like with finances, you weren’t just born with all of that knowledge. You had to learn, fail, learn, fail and learn again. Same thing with your fitness endeavor. It just takes time, it will all stick eventually.
pffft to the negative people out there. I like reading your fitness blog because it’s NOT perfect. You don’t preach. You don’t say don’t have a SnoBall. You’re just you and that’s what I enjoy reading because I’m not perfect either
Interesting distinction between GRS and here. I hadn’t noticed that. If you keep at this effort, I predict that you’ll one day be posting what you’ve already learned works with fitness, too. Above all, this space is yours to record your journey as you wish. Most of us have walked in the same shoes at some time or other, so you should find more kindred spirits than naysayers.
I, for one, am glad you’ll be “less scarce”.
I concur with Cammy. This blog happens to be about YOUR fitness journey, so write about it – the successes and the mistakes. Someone might learn a thing or two.
Definitely not annoying and always an interesting, entertaining read.
Keep up the great work!
–Steve
JD,
I was just over at GRS and reading about the advertorial proposition, I can’t tell you how my thoughts linked but suddenly I came up with the idea that you’d really sort of given up on fitness.
I think it was the fact that you were writing so passionately about your ethics for GRS, that I realized that your recent post here that basically said “I’ll be around, but not very much” made think that you were already mentally checked out of GFS.
Then I come here and see this post, and frankly it’s great to see it! I know Greenman (it always seems to be Greenman anyway) and others bust your chops, but I’m glad you’re willing to write about your progress even when there’s not much to report.
I wish you the best, and I’ll be around reading. I can’t promise I’ll always look at your charts/splits/whatever every time but I’m cheering for you both!
JD, I love that you post the truth, which includes the frustrations, the mistakes, as well as the successes. It is far more interesting for me to read what is really going on with someone, to see both the good and the bad, than to read just the glossed up version showing only the successes. I hope you continue to post whenever you have Snoballs and the like – I for one will not be criticizing you for it.
I’ve noticed and also wondered what the dealio is with the person who enjoys rubbing your “shortcomings” in. What is up with that.
Anyhoo, JD, you have had quite a lot going on, with GRS, the transition from the box factory job, your mom’s illness. Cut yourself some slack. I’m glad you decided to go at your own pace. Health and fitness is a personal journey for each of us.
Great post! Getting fit and healthy is hard work and what works for one doesn’t work for another. Find your path!
I like the fact that you share what really happens. If it doesn’t work it doesn’t work. Just move on.
WOOO HOOOO!!!!
good for you. Slow and steady wins it every time. You have to relearn and explore so much when you decide to become fit. I totally relate to your on again off again fall on my face and get back up again and then tell us all about it philosophy. Your honesty is refreshing and something I think most of us can relate to. We need to stop beating ourselves up (it is cheetos not sno-balls for me).
Slow and steady – with lots of setbacks. I am pretty sure that is the ONLY way to change (really interesting articles about this in this month’s “O” magazine).
Glad to see you back…and try to ignore feedback that isn’t helpful or compassionate.
Glad you haven’t given up on us. I think a lot of the comments you’re getting are people wanting to impart their wisdom and honestly, they aren’t meant as a criticism of you. More of a been there done that.
I actually enjoy your blog because you’re always ‘screwing up’ and are honest about it. It’s so human. We all know we should exercise and eat right, but don’t do it – why? Who knows?
Goofing up then starting again – very courageous. If I wanted straight fitness tips, which I don’t, there are a million other places to go for those on the web. Your blog is a different vision and inspiring in its own way. Cheers.
I think there’s a line from Batman Begins that would be appropriate here…
There is no one right way to lose weight or exercise or to get fit. You have to find what is right for you and what you will stick with the rest of your life. If you want that Hostess Snowball (yum, coconut), then you have to find a way to fit it in your regimen. I have counted calories for the last 9 years and have lost and kept 60 pounds off by doing it. When I want that Snowball or candy bar, I put it in the calorie count and then adjust the rest of the day around it. I can live with that without gaining weight. I cannot live with a diet that won’t allow me to treat myself now and then. You should do what you can live with. Good luck with your journey to getting fit!
I’m a personal trainer (with a fitness site) and I love a Sno-ball or brownie every now and then. (ok, more often than not!)
Ignore the negative Nellies and just keep on moving. I’m glad that you are back!
You were gone? No way! Well, if you say so Wellcome back!
I enjoy reading your setback and failure since they are so like mines.
Have a nice success.
From someone who has been on a fitness journey for the past 10 years (at least), your pace is totally normal. Start out gung ho, get waylaid by life and/or injuries or just plain burn out. You make a lot of progress and figure that the last 20 pounds will be as easy as your first 20 pounds. Then the reality sets in that you’ve experienced a backslide and grapple to figure out what you’ve done wrong and your not even sure if you want to start back up again because you don’t want to face failure.
It’s all normal and part of the learning process. Let people comment how they will and don’t take it personally. If they don’t feel this blog is helpful, there are plenty of other websites to chose from. What works for one person isn’t necessarily work for someone else. You need to find your own path and let go of things that don’t work for you. I think that is one of the most common things I see among people trying to get fit. They may have had moderate success with one thing, but as time goes on, it’s no longer working because your body adapts.
One of my favorite saying is – “If you keep doing what you are doing, you are going to keep getting what you got.” If you like where you are going – keep doing it. If you don’t, try something else because no amount of doing the wrong thing is going to give you the results you are looking for. Keep the faith JD.
Cheers!
Brigid
Cheers to being less scarce!
I recall distinctly about 2 years ago when I was at my heaviest, and I was complaining about my weight to my husband. He said, with brutal honesty, “but you never DO anything about it, you just complain.”
That hurt me. A lot. I was angry with him for the rest of the day. No matter that he was right, and that it was totally annoying to him that this person he cares about was just being self-destructive despite knowing what she was doing wrong…
Does that sound familiar?
I can’t speak for everyone who reads this site, but I _want_ you to succeed. Because you’re a normal guy with a normal life and all the struggles that entails, and if you can do it, maybe I can do it, too. I think some of us readers got frustrated with you because we see in you the potential that we have trouble seeing in ourselves. Does that make sense? We really appreciate your honesty. It’s OK to slip up, because everyone does, and it’s courageous to be public with those slip-ups. But if you have a few slip-ups in a row and your readers get a little frustrated, know that it’s because we know you can do better – you have done better. And you will do better. And we’ll cheer you on.
Welcome back!
Thanks, everyone.
I think @mhb makes a great point, though maybe it’s not the one she meant. I believe that the criticism is valid and warranted when I’m doing nothing. The anonymous comment that kicked my ass into gear last spring was spot on.
And though I know some of you are going to have feedback when I’m doing dumb stuff (“the all Hostess Sno-Ball diet!”), that’s fine. I realize now that it’s good to get that feedback. But I also realize that as long as I’m doing something, I shouldn’t be down on myself. It’s the not-doing that’s problematic.
I am right there with you, JD! I view my blog the same way – I just need to document it to help me figure things out. The feedback can be good, but ultimately, I do it for me.
I also feel way further along in terms of the financial piece (my blog is about both fitness and finance). Why was it so much easier to get that under control than the eating/exercising? I guess food is just much more of an emotional thing for me. But I think all of the lessons we are learning will only serve to make us more successful in the end. It IS a slow process for better or worse.
Good luck! I very much look forward to reading your posts.
I think it’s very easy for people who *don’t* have food issues and who do love exercise to criticise those of us who do. I have a very slim friend who doesn’t understand why I comfort eat. Yes, I know I shouldn’t do it, but learning not to is difficult. It’s easy for someone to say “just don’t eat the sno-ball.” Well DUH. But how do I learn to deal with things differently?
It helps me to think that for all they might have the eating and exercise down, they are probably failing in other areas. Are their finances in a mess? Can they cook a meal from scratch? Write a grammatical sentence? Everyone has a weak spot.
Also I try to remember that it’s likely they genuinely don’t understand my issue, rather than deliberately trying to lord it over me. Some of them are deliberately smug (and some commenters here do fall into that category), but most are just clueless as to what it’s really like.
personal admission: on my to-do list yesterday was “do not eat any more cookies.” I had three little ones at lunch (meringue cookies that one of my coworkers made, and there’s tons left in the kitchen), and I made it my mission to not eat any more for the rest of the day no matter how bored I got.
Know what? I succeed! But I don’t always succeed. There have been days when I eat 4 apple “muffins” out of the kitchen area and days where I snork on everything in sight.
I really love seeing you do the same thing because you always manage to dust off and get reinvigorated. And that is SO useful because it kicks me in the ass and makes me dust off too. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve gone to the gym after checking out your latest blog post (“ugh, JD went today. I really should go. I don’t wanna. But he went. Okay, okay, I’ll go.”). And that workout I didn’t want to do ends up being awesome. I secretly suspect it’s me wanting to do something useful with my time there if I took the time to go during a busy day.
My mission for today is to just have two small meringues with my lunch. I’ve been working out a lot (and snowshoeing and sometimes cross country-skiing for work), so I think it’s allowable. But I’m going to enjoy those two because I like the taste, I’m going to skip the other cookies in there (not as yummy), and I’m going to work on keeping that comfort eating to drinking tea or water.
{ 1 trackback }