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I don’t like going to the gym. I feel self-conscious. I am a middle-aged fat man, and exercising around young twenty-somethings makes me uncomfortable. Plus, when I’m on the treadmill, I tend to galumph. It’s never fun to galumph in front of an audience.
I’m especially self-conscious when I use the free weights. I’ve never been strong, and so in the past I’ve always felt like people were watching how little I was lifting.
You know what? Now that I’m getting close to 40 (I turn 39 in a few weeks), I just don’t care that much anymore.
Today’s trip to the gym — my first — was nearly ideal. The free weights are located downstairs, away from the aerobics equipment and the Nautilus machines. At 8:00 in the morning, there’s nobody else there! I had the entire free weight area to myself for an hour. I was able to work out my way without any sort of self-consciousness.
What’s my way of working out?
As I mentioned yesterday, next week I’ll begin following the Body for Life plan. The book recommends a specific set of exercises. Rather than fumble my way through them, I wanted to learn how each exercise was performed. So, I carried the book around with me, examining the text and photos as I moved from exercise to exercise. I jotted notes about how each exercise felt, and which weights I should use. This was perfect.
Today I taught myself the upper-body exercises. Tomorrow I’ll focus on the lower body.
It’s embarrassing for me to admit that on most of the exercises, I’m going to have to start with the lightest weights. Even the ten-pound dumbbells are too heavy for me in many instances. Dumb-bell side raises? Can’t do ‘em, even with the lightest weights. That’s how weak I am. Seriously. I’m basically starting from scratch.
But that’s okay. I’ll get fit slowly.
(At the Body for Life site, I found videos of all the exercises I’ll be doing.)
Mac
26 responses so far ↓
1 d.a. // Mar 5, 2008 at 7:15 am
You may be starting with the lightest weights, but think of it this way: the gains you’re gonna make will be INCREDIBLE. Great idea to work with the book and take notes on what felt right. Developing good form from the beginning will ensure you don’t cheat yourself. I’m cheering you on!
2 J.D. // Mar 5, 2008 at 7:21 am
Ten years ago when I was lifting weights, I’d feel this soreness a couple times per week. It meant I was making progress. I think that’s what it means here, too.
This afternoon after work I’ll go to the gym again and this time focus on my lower body. I’m certain I won’t have the weight room to myself, though.
Tomorrow I’ll do some aerobic exercise. (Actually, I may bike to the gym this afternoon if it’s clear outside, so I might get aerobic in today, too.) Friday I’ll do upper body again…
3 Karla // Mar 5, 2008 at 7:40 am
I know the gym can be an intimidating place, but when I’m there, when I see a larger person than me exercising, I never think about them in a mocking way. I always feel so proud of them for taking a first step toward fitness! And you know, I’m honest with myself because I”m thinner than my husband by half his weight, but he is so much healthier than me it’s not funny! And many of the bigger people at my gym could run circles around me. I too, can still only do the lightest weight, and it has nothing to do with my size, it’s simply because I’m a weakling too.
You are inspiring me. I’m following your progress and reading your tips and experiences. I’ve never been faithful in eating healthy or exercising and now because you are sharing your experience with just transparency, it’s given me the motivation to do the same - just start somewhere! Thanks for doing this blog.
4 Eric Nagel // Mar 5, 2008 at 7:49 am
Light weights aren’t always easy! In the plyometrics class that I take, there’s 14 of us nearly crying in pain with weights that are all 15lbs. or less!
Glad to see you made it to the gym!
5 Xanik // Mar 5, 2008 at 7:50 am
I’m right there with you in not being too keen to go to the gym. (I think even when I last had a gym membership, I went a total of maybe 3 times…) I just recently started to give loosing weight another shot and I have to say, you’re giving me encouragement to give the gym another go. (I’m actually considering the YMCA, since they have a lot of free resources for help for those that are members.)
6 Mark // Mar 5, 2008 at 7:54 am
Just wait until the “day after the day after”. That has always been when I have had the most pain and stiffness. For some reason the 2nd day is the worst. Just work through it and it will get better very quickly. I have found a light cardio workout after weights helps with post workout stiffness.
Don’t worry about starting with light weights. The important thing is to get your body used to the motions of lifting. After a couple of weeks you will be able to increase the weight.
7 Jonathan // Mar 5, 2008 at 8:00 am
Congrats. Don’t worry about the light weights. Just try to concentrate and not cheat on form. I am at the age (33) that I enjoy doing 12 reps at lower weights with good form rather than going high weights and battling to get 6 reps. I am no weight pro and prefer to run, but I think you will see quick gains by focusing on good form and higher reps. Keep up the good work.
8 greenman2001 // Mar 5, 2008 at 8:03 am
The gym is one of those places where monkey mind is most active: it just won’t shut up, telling you how far short you fall of the mark in every way. In that sense, it’s a laboratory for confronting your body image and self-esteem issues. Very challenging. For forty years you’ve bent and twisted and contorted your life in all kinds of ways to avoid feeling the pain of body image and self-esteem problems. Now you’re confronting them, hopefully letting some of that stuff go. This isn’t for the faint of heart. Most people just aren’t up to the task.
Listen to Eric Nagel: he’s the guy who has cut his body fat percentage in half while holding his weight steady. If you start exercising consistently, you’re about to learn just how difficult and impressive a feat that is. Eric, I’d love it if you’d talk more specifically about your eating and exercise programs.
9 Chris // Mar 5, 2008 at 8:26 am
hey!!! you GO, boy! Don’t worry about anyone else at the gym - they barely notice you - they’re much more focused on themselves. Don’t forget they’re in a little pain also, working out.
As a beginner, be careful not to do TOO much. Don’t hurt yourself, because that would set you back. Might be a good idea to find a kind trainer and get them to set you up with a beginner program?
Hang in there! Weights will give you noticeable results and you will feel stronger before too long.
10 Andre Blackman // Mar 5, 2008 at 8:32 am
The gym is one of those places where businesses show images of ultra fit and sexy people who you would think eat salads all day.
Forget about those who are around you and always have your goal image in the forefront of your mind when working out. I for one am super proud of you for getting out there and making this change.
My wife recently wrote on my blog about her experience with CrossFit, a high intensity workout company. Check it out for more inspiration. Keep up the good work JD!
11 MS // Mar 5, 2008 at 9:56 am
A few words of encouragement:
1 - As a fellow BFLer, I can tell you that it IS effective, and you WILL be exhausted as well as sore. I’m sure they’re all connected. Tough it out for the first week or two and you’ll start to feel human again
2 - Even if the weight room is full of people, they are generally focused on themselves, for the sake of safety or vanity. The ones who do notice you will be overwhelmingly encouraging.
3 - You’re doing great! Keep it up!
12 brad // Mar 5, 2008 at 10:09 am
I do worry about you overdoing it. In my mid 30s I had a very computer-intensive job (lots of typing on deadline, lots of using the mouse) plus I was lifting weights regularly, and I ended up getting a very serious repetitive strain injury that prevented me from typing at all. It took five years of physical therapy, massage therapy, and Alexander Technique to get me back to the point where I could type normally again (I used voice-recognition software in the interim). As someone who’s transitioning toward full-time blogging, you’ve got a big investment in your arms and hands, so just listen to your body and if you start feeling recurring numbness or other warning signs, back off. Remember that your goals are just that: goals. It’s not necessarily a cop-out to adjust them if you have good reason to down the road.
13 Joe Kennedy // Mar 5, 2008 at 10:39 am
JD,
and overweight.
Keep it up!!
Your stats and mine are pretty similar; almost 39, (I would not have gone with middle-aged, though
But I’ve still got another 30 lbs on you.
I had tried BFL before, but the demands at home were constraining, so I wish you luck.
14 Eden // Mar 5, 2008 at 10:41 am
Good luck with the gym. I lived in a gym when I was younger and had to lose 50 pounds. These days I can only go to the gym in peak hours so I prefer to work out at home. The Body for Life plan is great too- I followed that in the past too and really enjoyed it. I love the efficiency.
Glutamine is awesome for post workout soreness- get some powder and add it to a protein drink immediately following your workout and probably again the next day or later that day.
15 Josh // Mar 5, 2008 at 10:43 am
I think being really weak would be great for a beginner. Your gains are going to be astronomical.
I think it is very smart to take a week to learn the exercises. A lot of people would have just jumped in and tried to do the workouts without spending a few days only concentrating on form. If there are ever some big meathead guys there you should befriend them. Ask them how to do a specific exercise or to give you advice. They’ll become a fan of your’s as they watch your progress and probably be almost as helpful as a personal trainer.
-Josh
16 Anonymous // Mar 5, 2008 at 11:45 am
When I was a child and would run the quarter mile, I would be sore the same day. When I was in high school and college, I would be sore the day after sports practice.
Now I’m always the sorest two days after… just part of getting older, I guess!
17 Wesa // Mar 5, 2008 at 11:56 am
I’m a 20-something year old but when I’m working lower body, I have to use the lightest weights due to some serious knee problems. Honestly, I think people look at others who are working out to see if the machine is almost ready to be free, not how much weight you have. Good for you for going back!
18 Cammy // Mar 5, 2008 at 12:12 pm
I started with the light weights, too, and now I’m “all” the way up to the 20 and 25-lbs weights.
It’s not the size of the weights, but the effort your body expends to move them.
I just ordered the Body for Life book from my book swap club. I’m eager to see what the fuss is all about.
19 Cammy // Mar 5, 2008 at 12:14 pm
I forgot to say: good for YOU for taking that first trip!
20 Jon // Mar 5, 2008 at 1:46 pm
If you aren’t regularly lifting, you really need to start with very light weights for the first week or two. It’ll help you develop the right form and get your body used to the motions. It is very easy to over-train your muscles in the first workouts. Then you’ll be unable to work out for a week or two. You’ll be able to increase the weight rapidly after a couple workouts.
21 Joe Kennedy // Mar 5, 2008 at 2:02 pm
To follow-up with Jon’s comments.
Starting with the light weights is also essential as you perfect form and technique.
As a former high school teacher and coach, it was all too common for people to max out on plates with horrible form all the while imagining how beautiful and strong they were.
22 Brigid // Mar 6, 2008 at 7:16 am
I’ve always believed anything worth doing is worth doing badly. This meaning anything you do badly is a challenge and without challenge, there is no growth.
You do well to stay with the lightest weights. Form is everything and you can’t get the form if the weights are too heavy. Sooner than you think, you’ll be able to lifting twice what you are now and feel half as sore.
As for the people - don’t worry about it. Take a look around and you’ll notice everyone is only looking at themselves in the mirror and probably worried that people are looking at them. The big muscle-head guys are the worst offenders:-)
Keep up the great work!
23 AbileneBlues // Mar 6, 2008 at 11:33 am
Don’t give the other people a second thought. When I lift, the only time I take notice of others are for safety reasons and, very occasionally, to admire the beautiful form with which they are lifting.
The only times that I can say somebody has noticed me have been to say something encouraging either during or after a set and a couple of times to offer a tip on form.
If they have group classes (spinning, RPM, BodyPump, etc.), ask if they have any class times that are targeted for beginners. Classes can be a great thing. I’ve found that I am more likely to work harder when the instructor or the guy next to me is encouraging me. It also keeps you accountable if somebody says “Hey, missed you yesterday.”
If you are totally new to lifting, it might not be a bad investment to get a few sessions with a trainer. No, I’m not a trainer, and I’m not pushing for anything long term. They can really help you get a routine set up and correct your form so that you have a realistic workout for your level and you will know how to prevent an injury.
24 Aaron // Mar 6, 2008 at 1:01 pm
I’ve found weighted side raises to be very difficult at first, but I was really surprised at how quickly I progressed!
Last week, I could not complete 4 sets of 10 reps with 10 lbs weights. After the second set, I could not lift my arms even with my shoulders. But I finished my sets as best I could.
This week I can do all the sets! Towards the end of the 4th set it gets hard, but I can push through it. It was great to see that much progress. Very motivating.
25 Beth // Mar 10, 2008 at 4:57 am
I admire you J.D. for your honesty in describing your experiences. Please keep it up….a lot of us are in the same boat.
Question: Looking at the BFL daily progress reports, there is a column for intensity level and I can’t find an explanation for what exactly that means on the BFL website….anyone?
Also, how much does a standard barbell weigh with no added weights and in what increments do the plates come in? (Can you tell I am a COMPLETE newbie to this?) Thanks!!
26 Josh // Mar 11, 2008 at 2:17 pm
Congratulations on the 2nd hardest day of your workout routine (the 2nd/3rd day is hardest because you’re too sore to move). I used to follow Body for Life a few years ago and it is definitely a great program - I was in the best shape of my life after 4-5 months.
I wanted to give you a quick tip/piece of advice that rings in my head whenever I’m lifting: time the extensions/contractions, about 3 seconds each. I can’t stand seeing people in the gym lifting the weights so fast their arms/legs are just a blur. 3-up and 3-down. Form is 20x more important than how much weight you’re lifting especially when risk of injury comes into play.
Keep up the awesome work, you’re a great inspiration.
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